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The crumbling bastions of the heart...
20 most recent entries

Date:2006-01-15 20:13
Mood: contemplative

I was in Wal*Mart today with two friends and we came to the checkout line. Since I didn't need anything I went to a bench near the door and sat down. A family was walking towards me on my left, and the mom turned her head and said something like "Oh wow" or something along that line and walked back and went to some sort of magazine rack or something. At that angle, I thought it was a pamphlet or something, maybe she saw a good deal. I glance over and she is turning the magazine over, showing me a scantily clad girl on the cover. She places the magazine back down in this backwards position and I pretend to not have noticed at all. And as I am staring blankly in the opposite direction I think about what it is to be a parent in America. You try to do a good job raising your kids and you are constantly bombarded by these images that they don't necessarily need to be exposed to. I mean sure, the human body and sexuality and all that jazz is natural, but the way it is all presented in media and the like is in bad taste. I understand why there are some people who leave America to raise their kids. I mean, it's not necessary. There's more to life than that crap.

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Date:2006-01-13 14:44
Mood: relieved

This morning when I left at six o'clock, the door swung open before me and a thick fog greeted my eyes. And today is Friday the 13th. I just think that's so ... fitting, I suppose is the word I'm looking for. I think I heard somewhere that fog is just what you call a cloud that's on the ground. Whether or not that's true, I just revel in the concept of tasting the benefits of the heavens while keeping your mortal feet on the ground.

I really want this year to be different. I have creativity flowing within me again, more than recently. This past Semester I wasted it all by sleeping. And when I wasn't, I was either wasting it by telling jokes or chasing after something I didn't even know how to catch. Well, I'm done with it all. It's high time I started living my life and contributing back to this beautiful world.

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Date:2006-01-01 03:42
Mood: thoughtful

This morning the new year came, and lately I've been reflecting on my life and its meaning and that sort of thing.

I am different.

I am no longer that person I was earlier..... last year. I see beauty in things again. It's been so long since I could see beauty. This is huge for me.

I don't like the way I have been living my life. The thing about me is, I am a sensitive guy. Before college, my whole life dealt mainly with being at school or in my room, etc. I had a friend I would hang out with on occasion. I am not used to people. I am used to being around them in a classroom, but I am not used to people. It's hard for me to be in this situation where everyone is so .... there. I guess I lived a sheltered life, because so many lives and problems are thrust into my face and I find it difficult to deal with. There are personal things going on here at college that tear me up because I am there to witness them. The benefit of my old life was that I was never there, you know? I could retreat into the realm of doubt and denial. But here the dagger of truth is crammed down my throat and people look at me funny if I make a choking noise. It's not that I'm criticizing anyone, it's just that when I first came here I was ill-equipped to handle things. But that is changing. A lot. I truly feel like a new person. These past few weeks have altered me in ways I never thought possible. And it's all for the better.

As strange as it may sound, my being sensitive crushed me and my creativity. I was just susceptible to getting down a lot. This has changed, which has me excited. I have so many thoughts and ideas and planned ways and media to express them. I want to get back to my video ideas, which I have. I have even thought of a new dimension to this outlet that I believe will benefit me later down that road. I want to get back to shirts, which I have. I want to sort of take a break from poetry for now.

But songwriting seems interesting.

This past semester I lost my way because of things getting to me. I hereby encase my heart in a shell of steel. But don't worry, it won't be ignored. I just am not letting it run free anymore.

These are my thoughts of late, I hope I conveyed them well.

- Greg

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Date:2005-11-01 19:27
Subject:Albion your side.
Mood: full

Here is a poem called Albion. With Albion, of course, being the archaic name from England (Albion - albino..... White Cliffs of Dover). I like to write poems making fun of knights and stuff. I hope you enjoy (Garrett hated it.)


There once was a man from Great Britain and
His life's wish was to die for his homeland
In some sort of all-or-nothing battle.
Unfortunately for the man his hand
When wielding a sword instantly rattled.
Well, one day his wish was granted postehaste;
He decidedly disliked iron's taste.

Okay, it's not the best ever but I like it because I think it is good for writing in like five minutes in class. Also, every line is ten syllables (not blank verse...it rhymes).

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Date:2005-11-01 03:18
Mood: touched

Well, I have decided to start posting again. I think this is my 97th post, so I have to make sure the 100th is neat. Much has happened since last we met, Dear Reader.

I am in college, first and foremost. It's more of a change than I could ever have imagined.

And I've met some rather interesting people.

I have even met the girl of my dreams. The thought of her does things to me. I will just be walking from A to B and I will picture her. Her smile. The way her eyes pierce me. How she shoots fire in my veins and how all I can do is think to myself: God I love her.

I've never felt this way about anyone.
It scares me sometimes.

But sometimes fear is good.

I just wish I had a chance with her.

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Date:2005-06-16 17:48
Subject:No one gives a damn

I'm officially keeping this journal "frozen" until people actually start to give a damn.

I guess it's my fault that no one comments or tries to befriend me or anything on this thing:

(1) I am never on.
(2) No one likes me in the first place
(3) I never have anything important to say (But then again, who the hell ever really does?)


So, this is (for a while, at least) going to be my last entry.  If for some reason people actually want this thing back up, just comment saying so.  When I get enough, I'll think about it.  Heh, I have a feeling this thing will be down for a while.


But, since this is it and all, I have decided to add random things onto the end of this so that you get something out of this post at least.


Stuff I probably never posted:


I finally graduated from Thomas Dale HS.


I had my poetry book stolen when I left it in a classroom for 10 minutes.... fuckers.  Today though, Mr. Young gave me a journal type dealie thing as a gift, so that will probably house my poems (and  possibly more) from now on.


Girls can be fucked up in the head, no joke.  I blame society.


People need to quit dying.  So many young people died this year. : (


I will be attending St. Andrews Presbyterian College in N.C. this fall, to major in either English or Creative Writing.

I want to eventually end up working for Nintendo for my main income.


My Dream Job

"As the worldwide leader and innovator in the creation of interactive entertainment, Nintendo Co. Ltd., of Kyoto, Japan, manufactures and markets hardware and software for its popular home video game systems. The systems include Game Boy®, Nintendo® 64, Game Boy Advance and the NINTENDO GAMECUBE. Since the release of its first home video game system in 1985, Nintendo has sold more than 1.4 billion video games worldwide, creating enduring industry icons such as Mario and Donkey Kong and launching such franchises as Zelda and Pokemon. As a wholly owned subsidiary, Nintendo of America Inc., based in Redmond, Wash., serves as headquarters for Nintendo's operations in the Western Hemisphere.

At Nintendo we are proud to be working for the leading company in our industry. We are strongly committed to producing and marketing the best products and support services available. We believe it is essential not only to provide products of the highest quality, but to treat every customer with attention, consideration and respect. By listening closely to our customers, we constantly improve our products and services.

We feel an equal commitment toward our employees. We want to maintain an atmosphere in which talented individuals can work together as a team. Commitment and enthusiasm are crucial to the high quality of our products and support services. We believe in treating our employees with the same consideration and respect that we, as a company, show our customers.

Nintendo of America Inc is looking for an experienced creative Writer. The candidate's primary duties will include pitching article ideas, writing copy, proofing articles and collecting assets for Nintendo Power, Nintendo Player's Guides, nintendo.com and related publications projects. This person may also coordinate with licensees and other partners to obtain materials for use in Nintendo Power.

*Essential Duties: Writes copy, executes layouts and arranges screen shots for regular Nintendo Power columns and Nintendo Player's Guides; plays games to obtain knowledge for magazine articles and guide-book projects; communicates with V-Design to give input on game strategy for articles; communicates with other internal departments, licensees and outside companies to obtain game information; verifies correctness of screen shots and maps, and provides backup support for proofing; writes additional copy as requested; covers press events.


The Ideal candidate will have the following experience:
Two to three years' professional creative writing experience
An undergraduate degree, and/or professional certification, in English, Communications, or related field, or equivalent.
Strong creative writing skills
Strong working knowledge of Nintendo and other industry games and game premises to report in Nintendo Power and related publications and services PC word processing and spreadsheet skills (Word and Excel preferred) and Macintosh desktop publishing (Quark Express preferred)

Knowledge of Nintendo products and publications highly preferred.
Effective verbal and interpersonal skills to interact with department and NOA personnel and act as a liaison with vendors

Availability for approximately 5%-10% domestic and international travel

*This job description outlines primary duties and requirements and is not intended to identify all tasks that may be performed; individuals occupying the position may be required to perform other duties. The company may modify job duties from time to time, either in practice or in writing."


That job would flipping own.



Of course, my major focus is literary.  I hope to publish some poetry books or something in the future.

Ultimate Goals:  Pulitzer, Frost Medal   (These probably will never happen, but whatever.)

Right now: You can see my stuff in this year's Squire (Thomas Dale's literary magazine...I'm also in the previous two editions.)

Working on: I have a few pieces here and there, but I'm kind of taking a break right now (have been for a while.)



I saunter down this hidden trail,

Seeing what few have seen,

And perhaps that fact

Makes it all the more beautiful.


Sunlight filters through the canopy

And shines upon my face,

Warming me like cocoa

On a cold winter's morning.


Freedom reigns in this place,

A virgin land unsoiled

By man's tainted hands.


Flowers dot the path,

Jewels in nature's lofty crown.

Smelling them brings to mind

The girl down the street

And her many perfumes.


I now stand before this great oak.

It has endured for centuries,

And as I place my hand

On its flesh I can feel

Its gentle aura.


Freedom reigns in this place,

A virgin land unsoiled

By man's tainted hands.





So long, chum!


I'm flipping spoiling you guys with all this stuff no one will see.  I mean daaaamn.

Well, I can't think of anything else to say, so I now say (with a warm heart and even warmer embrace)



P.S. I have a myspace account!


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Date:2005-04-15 04:27
Subject:Wow it's been a while....

Okay, first post of the "new" year, and my first post as an "adult." I feel old. Just kidding.

Anyway, this night I saw Kara perform in a dance recital type deal, and she, as usual, was incredible.

It was funny because certain dancers had to get on a platform and read the history of some of the dances, and each one had something funny going on. They were very precocious (I am probably spelling that wrong, but it's 4:30 here so ...), which I find kind of odd. This one girl is my *love* Psyke in my dreams maybe.


I left for a really long time apparently, so I am behind in much?

Oh and James Taylor is officially my favorite artist.

Okay that's enough for a first post.

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Date:2004-12-29 00:13
Mood: contemplative

So, yes, I've decided something that I believe to be a truth:

"Committing suicide is trying to forget the person you cannot live without."

- Gregory Gray (aka me.)

And you can quote me on that.

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Date:2004-10-02 16:16
Subject:** Slit my throat, bash me and slash me **
Mood: depressed

It's now official:

She hates me,

and I

hate my life.

Someone fucking kill me.

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Date:2004-10-02 11:59
Subject:Nile Paper Save thing...pay no attention

Over 4,100 miles in length, the Nile is the longest river in the world. Over the millennia, it has served and influenced mankind in a multitude of ways, ranging from farming to religion.
The Nile has been integral to farming in Egypt for thousands of years. Both the Nile Delta and the Nile Valley are among the most fertile farming areas in the world. Before 1968, silt was deposited in those places by water from the Nile flowing into the Mediterranean. This process was ended in 1968 with the advent of the Aswan High Dam at Aswan, Egypt, which trapped the silt in Lake Nasser. Despite this, farmers are able to raise different crops around the year. In the winter, the more common crops are beans, wheat, clover, as well as other vegetables. During the summer, chief crops include millet, rice, cotton, and corn. Financially speaking, Egypt’s most necessary crop is cotton.

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Date:2004-10-02 11:23
Subject:** I'm never gonna dance again, guilty feet have got no rhythm **
Mood: bored

It's been a while since I updated last, and because she wants me to update more, I dedicate this entry to Kara. :-p Right now I'm doing a paper on the Nile. :X Ugh.

Well that's all for now. Maybe I will do another one later.

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Date:2004-08-29 02:44
Subject:** Your eyes mesmerize, and I take your lies **
Mood: cheerful

Sigh, the Olympics are all but over. There are a few things happening today, but yeah, it's over.

Rank By Gold

NOC Tot.
1 USA 34 38 28 100
2 CHN 31 17 14 62
3 RUS 23 26 35 84
4 AUS 17 16 16 49
5 JPN 15 10 11 36
6 GER 14 15 18 47

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Date:2004-08-28 12:23
Subject:** No matter how hard I try, you fall and I die **
Mood: apathetic

Hmm let's see.

I got my senior pictures done. Let's hope they don't suck.

In a few days I will be going to get my school schedule, whereupon I shall post it here. Hopefully they didn't screw up, because I have swell classes this year.

I never have anything to say. And I hate that.

I am going to be busy this year, because there's much to do.

I am working on:

The Knightly News (Features Editor)
Squire (Assistant Editor probably)
The 2005 Reflector

Also, I have many clubs:

Academic Team, Photography Club, German Club, Chess Club, etc etc.

And I will have night school for a while.

So yeah, pretty busy.

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Date:2004-08-23 15:49
Subject:School is....cool?
Mood: excited

I have night school tonight for the first time. If I am not there on time, they kick me out.....ugh. Well, I have my snazzy TI-84 Plus Silver Edition (Or something like that).

Carly....I might miss her tonight. Noooooo.

And Kupets is also my love after last night's uneven bars.

Kara is seeing some guy named ****. Who? You may never know.

And her friend is joining her dance studio, which is a plus, I believe.

Kara rocks my socks. Period.

I am done for now, yep.


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Date:2004-08-20 00:28
Mood: content

Well, I have been obsessed with the Olympic Games lately.

And Carly Patterson is the love of my life. <3 <3

Oh, if only you knew. She = the most beautiful girl. Ever.

Well I can think of someone else, but Carly makes me giddy. Geeeeeeze.


I start night school/Algebra 2 on Monday. And no, I did not fail it....so back off.

Oh and crossword puzzles are my new passtime.

I felt like I had more to say when I started, but nothing is coming to mind. Darn it.

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Date:2004-08-17 15:05
Subject:**Your eyes, your concrete eyes**
Mood: blank

I thought I would start off like Smashlee. I might adopt it for every entry, I don't know.

Kara's a cool kid, even though she never responds on AIM and reads about foot fungus all day long.

If we are in a class this year, there will be much rejoicing.

Four years in a row it would have been.

I. heart. her.

My computer at home is being ridiculous. So I might have to update here or there when it lets me.

Gosh school is coming up. Last year, wow.

And so are senior pictures. A bit of a big deal.


Dana Lee is the new Sarah Lee AND Bruce Lee. She rocks.

Hopefully my classes will be what I wanted. Unlike Smashlee, I take seven virtually at the same time.

It's okay, I still love ya haha.

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Date:2004-08-12 00:17
Subject:I. Suck.
Mood: crushed

I have a problem saying things without shutting up. And now I have a problem saying things I don't mean that make me appear to be someone I'm not.

My night was going okay:

DnzinQT: dont know if i ever told you this..but your one of my coolest friends
DnzinQT: probably my best guy friend *almost*


DnzinQT: i just wish more people at school would give you a chance and see how cool and funny you can be ahha

Made my night


I screwed it up by being a loser. Man I don't even know why I said those things.

I am so sorry.

And I hate that it makes me appear to be someone I'm not

I just hope that you can forgive me

not that I deserve it

Greg, you really screwed up this time.

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Date:2004-08-10 19:42
Mood: horny

Haha I found the ultimate picture of Kara.

Should I post it?

Hell yes. Haha this is too rich.

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Date:2004-08-10 19:19
Mood: ecstatic

I found a way to update at my house. I hope this works.

I met a new bud today. Her name is Dana. She rocks my socks.

The end.

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Date:2004-08-09 13:49
Mood: bored

I am really, really bored. It cannot be helped.

Haha on Saturday I was at Books-a-million and this kid wanted to play me in Yu-gi-oh!...man it was great. I don't actually play it though I know a few things. But not enough, so I had to have a friend coach me. Anyway, you start out with 8000 points that the dudes defend. He had increased his to 9000 and done over 5000 worth of damage to me in one turn.....and I STILL put him in a position where he had to forfeit. Oh holy crap it was great. "I lost to a beginner!" What a fucker lol.


Someone save me from this boredom. I'll do anything.

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